wet eyes

I haven't cried in a really really long time. But, sometimes, crying feels so wonderful. I cried tonight for the first time in who knows when. I cried for everything. And let me tell you, having a mother who listens is one of the many blessing in my life. I love her more than the world. She gave me incredible advice for making it through life in one piece. I have trouble understanding life and people sometimes. We are all here and no one can make you happy unless you let them. No one can make you sad unless you let them. In all truth, you are responsible for your own happiness, your own emotions. I worry a lot, about a lot. That is just my personality. Pleasing everyone is impossible. That is the truth. You either make everyone else happy, while you neglect your own happiness, or you find a balance of both. Making people happy while also making yourself happy. I also need to learn when to say NO. You cannot do everything.
I sometimes wish that I lived back when text messages, emails, television, cars, radios, walkie-talkies, and telephones did not exist. Instant communication is a cause for a lot of problems and drama. When letters and carriages were the only forms of communication, people put a lot more thought into what they were saying. I am guessing here, since I didn't live back then.
No matter what I do or say, however, I know that my family will always love me. Unconditional love is a rarity.
When I get down, I can rely on my mom, a samoa girlscout cookie, a hot bath, and some Jack Johnson ukulele to calm me and put me back into that happy place. And I hope that never changes.
Goodnight, and happy dreams. When you feel down, run to the things you love. No matter how far away they may be.


"No one can make you feel inferior without your permission." - Eleanor Roosevelt
what an incredible woman.